A Re-start?

It's been aaaaaaaa while since I last wrote here. Waiting for the right time to summarize, update, and give future plans on what's been happening at the church... But, that perfect time, as often is the case, never came. And, today is as good of day to write as any other previous days.

For the past month, it is true that I have felt a little knocked down. About a month ago from today, the outside organization that has promised to be our financial supporter has decided to back out. And, since this organization was the only major supporter we have had (comprising about 75% of total budget), it was big enough news to reexamine everything we have been pursuing - at least the way we've been doing things.

In the beginning, I only treated it as a "financial" issue. I said to myself... "Alright. We lost our biggest donor. Tough! But, so what? just go out and get some other donors. And, we will be on track again!" However, as the month has passed by, I began to realize that this was more than just a financial matter. God has revealed to us that it was almost a restart for our church. You see, what happened to us financially really gave us an opportunity to look at ourselves in terms of everything from our identity, our mission and vision, and our goals and strategies.

I tell myself and others that the past 6 months was like a paid-internship. We were financially supported to do something we didn't have any previous experience of. And since it was paid by someone else, we were doing things largely based on what we were being told by the one who has hired us as an "intern". I, among others, learned a lot - all good lessons. But, the time finally came upon finishing that paid-internship whether we would continue on the path we were brought into or go out and do something on our own. Both voluntarily and involuntarily, we are now following the latter route. The only upsetting part is that I wish we would have been prepared better for this turn of event. I wish we would have known this to be a temporary paid internship, not as a permanent support system which we had thought...
Oh well, life goes on.

The bottom line: We are no longer dependent on anyone for our finance. Also, we are not following anyone else's suggestion as to what kind of church we should build. Of course, it's God's church and his vision for us. We now simply don't have to hear God via others. For this, we are more scared than ever, yet more freed and motivated than ever also. It is said that whenever there is a crisis there is an opportunity. It is a financial crisis for us, but I believe it also is a new opportunity to build our church on the right foundation - one that is more solid than anything else we have had until now.

Where to go from here? We are currently reassessing everything. We are no longer meeting where we used to meet. We are looking for a new home, even new vision and people. Financially, all of the 3 staff members will go unpaid (we lost one staff member but gained a new one). Perhaps we will all live together and share things together - yea, the way how the original church was in Acts!

May God protect us! May God show us the way. Yes, we already know the true way in Jesus Christ. May we be faithful to the calling God has given to us...